I can’t help but wish I’d started this journey twenty years ago - but equally I have no idea what I would have written about then either. Your words are helping me move forward and they are well worth the time - so thank you for writing them.
Yeah, the trend of using first-person active voice is...interesting. Right now I'm reading Sally Rooney's INTERMEZZO. It's filled with Gen Z lingo and is 3rd person active voice. It does, I suppose, make it feel more "immediate," but it also feels sort of contrived for this generation.
For a writer famous for short, declarative sentences and action scenes involving hunting and fishing, Hemingway sure used a lot of to-be verbs in his descriptions. I wonder how much of that would make it past a modern workshop or English teacher? I sometimes prefer it, but I know I’ve worked to weed those passive verbs out of my prose (more so in the past - now I just go with the flow, hehe).
I would still argue that active voice is generally better, though it's true that passive voice isn't always wrong. As with most grammatical principles, it is situational in nature.
We should also be conscious of how often passive voice is misused, for example in a sentence like, "Mistakes were made," a deceptive way of acknowledge error while camouflaging whose error it was.
I agree. 😄 I don't know if I'll tackle it though. I might. It's a subject that gets covered pretty well, from many different takes. My intent here is to hunt down the tools and techniques available to us as our prose style advances... information that's generally hard to find, and that has me a bit nervous after 14 essays. I want at least 25 in this series, preferably more, and I'm always afraid I'll run out. We'll see.
Fair enough! 14 seems like a good effort, Thaddeus. 25 - amazing! I suppose, if you continue to turn to those writers that inspire you and analyse how they write, what their idiosyncrasies are, where they tend to break with convention, you'll have plenty to go on :)
How does this sound? "Patched with flour sacks, whether furled or limp, the flag signaled permanent defeat." Passive voice isn't used exactly. 'Patched with flour sacks' is used as the first adjectival phrase. 'Whether furled or limp' is a second adjectival phrase. Correct?
As for your paragraph about Preston Hughes, what do you think of this?
The original pages are splattered with the author’s blood, the journal having fallen from his grasp, arterial spray bleeding–bright blood bleeding–between the letters and the fibers of each page, hiding forever the letters he’d written–his forever declarations of love–to be delivered, presumably, upon her death. Death came, instead, for Preston Hughes, long-time producer and would-be villain if he left the journal for me to find. First the bloody journal. Then the bloody woman. Then the man I thought I knew.
After all, bloody, to the Brits, is tantamount to saying "fucking journal" and "fucking woman" has a double meaning, negative and perhaps positive? If she fucks, she might well be friendly, right? :) But the thrust of the paragraph is the teaser at the end: Then the man I thought I knew.
So much to learn - so little time!
The greatest cost of reading is the time spent. Thank you for spending some of yours with me. I appreciate it.
I can’t help but wish I’d started this journey twenty years ago - but equally I have no idea what I would have written about then either. Your words are helping me move forward and they are well worth the time - so thank you for writing them.
Yeah, the trend of using first-person active voice is...interesting. Right now I'm reading Sally Rooney's INTERMEZZO. It's filled with Gen Z lingo and is 3rd person active voice. It does, I suppose, make it feel more "immediate," but it also feels sort of contrived for this generation.
I need to check that one out
For a writer famous for short, declarative sentences and action scenes involving hunting and fishing, Hemingway sure used a lot of to-be verbs in his descriptions. I wonder how much of that would make it past a modern workshop or English teacher? I sometimes prefer it, but I know I’ve worked to weed those passive verbs out of my prose (more so in the past - now I just go with the flow, hehe).
There comes a time when the ear knows better. 😃
I would still argue that active voice is generally better, though it's true that passive voice isn't always wrong. As with most grammatical principles, it is situational in nature.
We should also be conscious of how often passive voice is misused, for example in a sentence like, "Mistakes were made," a deceptive way of acknowledge error while camouflaging whose error it was.
I agree i on all counts
Next could you reclaim 'telling' as in 'show don't tell' - one of my least favourite writing rules!
I agree. 😄 I don't know if I'll tackle it though. I might. It's a subject that gets covered pretty well, from many different takes. My intent here is to hunt down the tools and techniques available to us as our prose style advances... information that's generally hard to find, and that has me a bit nervous after 14 essays. I want at least 25 in this series, preferably more, and I'm always afraid I'll run out. We'll see.
Fair enough! 14 seems like a good effort, Thaddeus. 25 - amazing! I suppose, if you continue to turn to those writers that inspire you and analyse how they write, what their idiosyncrasies are, where they tend to break with convention, you'll have plenty to go on :)
How does this sound? "Patched with flour sacks, whether furled or limp, the flag signaled permanent defeat." Passive voice isn't used exactly. 'Patched with flour sacks' is used as the first adjectival phrase. 'Whether furled or limp' is a second adjectival phrase. Correct?
As for your paragraph about Preston Hughes, what do you think of this?
The original pages are splattered with the author’s blood, the journal having fallen from his grasp, arterial spray bleeding–bright blood bleeding–between the letters and the fibers of each page, hiding forever the letters he’d written–his forever declarations of love–to be delivered, presumably, upon her death. Death came, instead, for Preston Hughes, long-time producer and would-be villain if he left the journal for me to find. First the bloody journal. Then the bloody woman. Then the man I thought I knew.
After all, bloody, to the Brits, is tantamount to saying "fucking journal" and "fucking woman" has a double meaning, negative and perhaps positive? If she fucks, she might well be friendly, right? :) But the thrust of the paragraph is the teaser at the end: Then the man I thought I knew.
The possibilities are staggering! 😃 I've taken some inspiration from your stories in writing this one
I've always thought that was a dumb rule. I write in the way that makes my words clearest and most pleasing to the ear. Active voice be damned.
I'm going to have to pay attention next time I read your work! 😃 I want to see your writer's ear in action.